Monday, March 07, 2011

Day 25 - A picture of your favorite day~ Abigale's Birth Story.

Jan. 20th, 2010

The story and value of this day actually starts with this photo taken on November 8, 2007.
I am behind those closed doors, knocked out because my epidural wouldn't take up my chest fast enough for the ER C-section to deliver Jesse.
I know no birth plan ever works out like you had planned but this was the complete opposite.  
John was not in there.  My doula/BFF Lindsey was not in there.  They were going to be allowed when it was a normal C-section but when I had to be completely sedated, no one I loved was allowed in the room, except for Jesus.  Thankfully, Lindsey had made me read Birthing From Within earlier and there had been enough scenarios of C-sections that I was prepared for what was about to happen.  So as they strapped down my arms, I began to pray.  That was the only thing that helped me cope with the turn of events.  But, as Lindsey kept saying, "it was the next best thing".
So Jesse was born at 2:40 pm and they did let John & Lindsey in to see him shortly after birth.  I didn't wake up for another 2 hours alone in a cold room so I am sad to say we missed that first family picture, that picture of the first time I got to look into his beautiful blue eyes.
I ended up with numerous complications with my C-section, including infections and nicked nerves that made me scream uncontrollably and walking hunched over for about 3-4 weeks afterwards.   
So...when I was pregnant with Abigale, my constant declaration was that I would VBAC her.  [Vaginal Birth After C-section]
I wanted to be fully present for this birth!  
So after having to present my case uncountable times to every midwife and doctor I saw, I was going to be able to deliver her the way I had hoped!  
Then they wanted to induce me. I knew that was an anti-VBAC move and I kept saying this to them.  
So we prayed. 
And they brought me in for an induction on January 15th. 

I was at a "0", meaning my body wasn't ready and Abigale was not planning on coming out.  However, the "aggressive" midwife [eventually all 6 of them would get nicknames], decided to strip my membranes.  *Note: with Jesse, I was at a "2" and my doctor at that time said it was not favorable to strip that soon.  "0" is even less favorable.  I'm just saying...NOT cool.
She stripped the next day, too, and tried to break my water when I was barely a 2.  Thanks be to GOD because I had my eyes clinched tight in pain when I "heard" OPEN YOUR EYES! There was Aggressor with the instrument, ready to break my water without a warning.  I climbed up the bed away from her.  I would have probably had another C-section if she had her way.
So after a "maybe" from the Aggressor, a YES from the Cheerleader the next afternoon and then a welcome "Either we break your water and you get a C-sec probably or we send you home and try again next week" from the Voice of Reason, I was sent home from this failed induction.  Hurray! 
The following Monday, the 19th, we came in again for another try.
And again, I didn't progress in their timely manner.  And again, the baby's heartbeat would be a little stressed.  So again, I was strapped to the bed, which is another anti-VBAC move. 
So we prayed.
The next day was our last chance since we had both been on pitocin and everything else they give you for 4 days at this point...not good.
The 6th midwife I saw through all of this said that if I didn't progress favorably by the next time she checked me, I was going to the operating room.
And we prayed again.  We asked for prayer from our friends. We prayed specifically. We posted on FaceBook for prayer.  Then we waited in anticipation to see how God would answer our prayers.. 
And the midwife was delayed..delayed by hours.. then she came in and I was READY!  We praised and cried and praised God again!  We called my mom & grandma to come back to the hospital!  We also called Brandi, our friend from church who had been my nurse through both of these hospital stays and she made it back up, too.
The epidural they required was a thankful respite from the pain of the pitocin induced labor pains.  The relief was just enough to allow me to feel the pressure and pain so I was in control knowing when contractions were coming and when it was time to push.  That couldn't have been done better.
So John was on one side and Brandi on the other, while midwife and nurse encouraged me. The mirror was up because I wanted to absorb every moment of this event.  Mom & Grandma sat on the couch to the side of me, experiencing something like this for the first time from that angle.
 At the end, if she was okay, they were going to allow me to pull her out myself.  At the end, I was a bit delirious and looked up at that mirror, seeing her head and thinking "There is no way I can reach that high up and do everything else, too".  Next time, someone remind me where exactly they are coming out of..geesh. 
So at 8:09 pm, Abigale made her grand entrance heard loudly on her due date of January 20th.
And we cried and praised and sat there in awe of what we just experienced.  
For me, this birth redeemed the "loss" I had felt with Jesse's birth.  
I fully participated in this birth.  
God granted my desires with an amazing delivery.
"Gigi" with Abigale.  


 I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire.  He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed.  They will put their trust in the Lord. Psalm 40:1-3

Through the last days of this journey, I held fast to the praise song, I Have to Believe by Rita Springer. 
 I have to believe, he sees my darkness
I have to believe, he knows my pain
I have to lift up, my hands to Worship
Worship his name
I have to declare, that he is my refuge
I have to deny, that i am alone
I have to lift up, my eyes to the mountains, thats where my help, it comes from
oh yeahhh
He said that he's forever faithful
He said that he's forever true
He said that he can move mountains
If he can move mountains
He can move my mountain, he can move your mountain too
I have to stand tall, when the wind blows me over
I have to stand strong, when i'm weak and afraid
I have to grab hold, a hold of the garments, the garments of praise..
~  ~  ~

Thanks for reading this very long entry..  
What was your favorite day?  
What's your birth story?

1 comment:

Kristin said...

Thank you for allowing me to read your birth story. I experienced many of those same emotions after my first C section. What a powerful redemption. What a wonderful God we serve. You just made my day and I feel blessed to know you and call you a friend.